I'm having a moment, and I have these often, where I just feel like I absolutely must write something but once I sit down in front of my keyboard my eyes look far past the screen into the deep corners of my brain and I unconsciously travel to a thought in which...
Never mind. Daisy just entered the room and asked me thirteen times, "what is the wish that you choose... and what are those? What are those two things? What are those two pink things up there? On that shelf, Mommy. When you get up you can see them." (She's referring to two wrapped birthday gifts that are not for her). Sigh. I love her dearly and all of her daylong chatter and her bright questions and adorable little face and the sixteen games of Hello Kitty UNO we just played but man alive, can I get ten minutes? Can I get five?? Shoot.
This is inevitably what happens every time I start a new blog post. Which is why you see my posts maybe twice per year. There was a time when I would write daily. And it meant a lot to me to do so. Whether in blog form or journal. Now I'm best on a post-it-note. Something like this:
Rummy - vet
Glasses
Bedding.
Gives you chills, doesn't it?
Well, hey, we can't hold on to our hobbies and favorite pastimes forever, right? At least not during the first, say, six years of your child's life anyhow. You may be wondering why I don't just plop down and write after the kids go to bed at night. That's a good thought. But that isn't my creative time anymore. That's the time when I need things to entertain me because I've been sapped of all creative power since about 7 pm. So reruns of The Golden Girls coupled with a few pages of a Mindy Kaling book and I'm happy as a clam... until I fall asleep mid-enjoyment thus ruining my "me-time" (and I absolutely despise that term by the way but that's neither here nor there).
"I want to take my belt off but I can't!!!!!!!.... Oh, never mind, Mommy. You can wear this belt... cuz I don't want to wear it..... It looks like a necklace." {Places the "necklace belt" right on top of my mouse}.
Back to my nonsensical train of thought. Where wasn't I? ...
"Mommy, when I hold my eye with a hand it only leaves one eye open! Wanna see me do it? And it goes back up again!!"
I love her. Daisy is just amazing. She's the sweetest, most thoughtful and caring and selfless child. Her heart impresses me. Truly. She's currently learning to read and she's doing really well. It makes her so proud, she smiles the whole time. Watching her sound out those words are some of the best moments of each day. Her will is super strong. Which is incredibly challenging most times but comes in handy a lot too. It has been a true pleasure to be home with her these past few years. She will be starting school in the Fall and she's SO excited about it. I hope it's everything she hopes for.
Now, if you'll excuse me I have an UNO rematch to attend with my little charmer.
"Alexa, play 70's rock."
Showing posts with label stay at home mom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stay at home mom. Show all posts
March 5, 2019
January 10, 2014
they wear you out... but it's worth it
Ahhhhhh. Soaking in the moment when I am DONE for the day. Scarlett is in the crib, Brody's gone outside and had his snack, dishes are all done, humidifiers filled and all chores have commenced ... until tomorrow morning.
The rat-race.
It's so funny how you can read a million of those articles/blogs titled something like I may not have a job but I work just as hard as a stay-at-home parent and not realize that it's completely true until you actually become that parent. You get whacked with that realization * omg YUP, so true *... and then you wonder how you didn't see it before.
I really had no idea how consuming being a stay-at-home-mother can be. Year one didn't feel so crazy. Things were moving at a slower pace. Sure, Scarlett was growing and changing rapidly but she wasn't really mobile or terribly demanding. Year two sped things up drastically, leaving me to count on one hand the amount of times I sat down in a day. Year three is proving to be a weird mix. Scarlett can play by herself for longer periods of time and I don't have to watch her as closely in some situations. But she's still in diapers, fiercely stubborn, very energetic and a daredevil. Mealtime can be exhausting. Bath-time can be frustrating. Nap-time has turned into Scarlett's own Broadway show but at least it gives me an hour break. Add in heaps of laundry, swiffering and vacuuming dog hair, preparing meals, paying bills, running errands, cleaning, washing dishes - it's go, go, go until bedtime. We read books each night (she always pushes for 'one more') then we sing songs (again, 'one more') and then she cries when I put her in the crib - for just a minute or two. (She's never ready to rest). I head down the hallway and down the stairs and sigh. That sigh is not because I'm getting rid of her ... but because I'm getting time for myself after a long day. I love her like mad but need to be away from her too. To replenish my patience at the very least. Because let's face it, spending time with anyone for thirteen hours a day can be pretty trying.
I spend the first hour of my day drinking coffee and watching Today (or Roseanne). I need that little wake-up time before I start the grind. Scarlett's up by 7:20 so I am up by 6:20 every day. There are no days off, there are no weekends. She's not going to get up and make herself some eggs. She's not going to change her diaper and get dressed. She needs me. And I love that she does! I treasure that moment when she sees me open her door and announces, "MAMA!" with her great big honest grin.
And I treasure it even more than when I close her door at night - no matter how exhausting the day has been.
My motto to share with new parents (and old pros) everywhere is 'just hang in there'. Every dreadful phase passes and every tiring day/night comes to an end. The amazing thing about being a parent is that for all of the frustrating and trying moments there are countering lovely moments. You just have to be sure you're soaking up the lovely ones more than the ones that wear you down. So the next time you're admiring your little one as they play quietly to themselves - soak it up. The next time they giggle at something silly with their amazing honest giggle of crazy happiness - soak it up. The next time they hug you, kiss you or hand you a soggy pretzel to eat - eat the soggy pretzel, kiss them back and squeeze them tighter. Soak it all up. Those moments will power you through their next meltdown - or yours. ;o)
The rat-race.
It's so funny how you can read a million of those articles/blogs titled something like I may not have a job but I work just as hard as a stay-at-home parent and not realize that it's completely true until you actually become that parent. You get whacked with that realization * omg YUP, so true *... and then you wonder how you didn't see it before.
I really had no idea how consuming being a stay-at-home-mother can be. Year one didn't feel so crazy. Things were moving at a slower pace. Sure, Scarlett was growing and changing rapidly but she wasn't really mobile or terribly demanding. Year two sped things up drastically, leaving me to count on one hand the amount of times I sat down in a day. Year three is proving to be a weird mix. Scarlett can play by herself for longer periods of time and I don't have to watch her as closely in some situations. But she's still in diapers, fiercely stubborn, very energetic and a daredevil. Mealtime can be exhausting. Bath-time can be frustrating. Nap-time has turned into Scarlett's own Broadway show but at least it gives me an hour break. Add in heaps of laundry, swiffering and vacuuming dog hair, preparing meals, paying bills, running errands, cleaning, washing dishes - it's go, go, go until bedtime. We read books each night (she always pushes for 'one more') then we sing songs (again, 'one more') and then she cries when I put her in the crib - for just a minute or two. (She's never ready to rest). I head down the hallway and down the stairs and sigh. That sigh is not because I'm getting rid of her ... but because I'm getting time for myself after a long day. I love her like mad but need to be away from her too. To replenish my patience at the very least. Because let's face it, spending time with anyone for thirteen hours a day can be pretty trying.
I spend the first hour of my day drinking coffee and watching Today (or Roseanne). I need that little wake-up time before I start the grind. Scarlett's up by 7:20 so I am up by 6:20 every day. There are no days off, there are no weekends. She's not going to get up and make herself some eggs. She's not going to change her diaper and get dressed. She needs me. And I love that she does! I treasure that moment when she sees me open her door and announces, "MAMA!" with her great big honest grin.
And I treasure it even more than when I close her door at night - no matter how exhausting the day has been.
My motto to share with new parents (and old pros) everywhere is 'just hang in there'. Every dreadful phase passes and every tiring day/night comes to an end. The amazing thing about being a parent is that for all of the frustrating and trying moments there are countering lovely moments. You just have to be sure you're soaking up the lovely ones more than the ones that wear you down. So the next time you're admiring your little one as they play quietly to themselves - soak it up. The next time they giggle at something silly with their amazing honest giggle of crazy happiness - soak it up. The next time they hug you, kiss you or hand you a soggy pretzel to eat - eat the soggy pretzel, kiss them back and squeeze them tighter. Soak it all up. Those moments will power you through their next meltdown - or yours. ;o)
June 11, 2013
Richmond: the early years
I've been doing some reminiscing lately. Thinking back on my childhood. The long, lazy days of summer when the sun seemed to shine for twenty hours each day. The chilly months filled with the smell of burning wood and simmering soup. Long before I had any sort of real responsibility... or that pesky crippling bug phobia.
Between the ages of two and six I lived in Richmond, RI. On a winding, wooded road called Gardiner. My parents had built a ranch home on a nice sized lot complete with a blueberry patch and plenty of poison ivy. My first crush was on a man named Pete who built the stone retaining wall out back. That very wall would become my kitchen counter where I made mom many a tasty lunch out of plastic raspberries. My father kept the yard nice and even painted the large rock that adorned our front lawn. We made lots of snowmen in that front yard and headed out Trick-or-Treating down the gravel driveway.
Not far up the road was Shady Acres nursing home. I remember at Christmastime we would spend a few hours there cheering up the residents by singing Christmas carols alongside our neighbors. I know, it sounds incredibly corny now but it was so sweet. Something right out of the movie Funny Farm. We had wonderful neighbors. Sure, there were a couple of oddballs who ran a jewelry ring and made moonshine in the basement, and that lady who would spray her diaper-clad toddler with the garden hose - but mostly really kind and generous people that you could depend on. Many families with young children. My brother had lots of friends on our street and, while I was younger than most, I always managed to fit in with the crew.
There was a large campground up the road from our house and in front was a small candy store. My brother and I walked there often - sometimes with mom or with our beloved Paul. No matter the wide variety I always chose my favorite - the five flavor Chuckles. To this very day I can't taste a Chuckle without being transported back to those wonderfully innocent times. Awesome when that happens, huh?
My brother and I were always playing games. I remember Mister Mouth was very popular, I loved that game. We also enjoyed Lite Brite, Simon, Chutes and Ladders, Candy Land and Hungry, Hungry Hippos. I remain a huge fan of the game Memory and even now I can picture the little strawberry card. We rode our Big Wheels alllllllll the time. We called them "Hot Cycles". We would ride them around and around in our musty basement - I can still smell that must. On nice days we stayed outside all day long. There was a construction site close by and we used to play in the huge dirt mounds, climbing and jumping. I could really hang with the roughnecks back then. Nowadays God forbid I get dirt under a fingernail. What happened to that messy little girl???
During the colder months I would help dad bring in wood for the wood stove. Wheelbarrow-ing heaps from the woods behind our house through the bulkhead into the cellar. Dad was clad in flannel and I in my plaid pants and gigantic coat. Mom would have my favorite noodle soup ready on the stove and together we would catch a bit of The Price is Right while lunching. I remember sitting in front of that television with my multicolored wooden blocks and a metal lunchbox. I was only three or four and wanted to pack a lunch like my school-aged brother. The red square was my sandwich, the yellow triangle was cheese and the purple cylinder was my grape soda of course. Mom stayed at home with me while my brother was in school and my dad, a Navy Veteran, split time between his full time job at the V.A. Hospital, Johnson & Wales University and the National Guard. I loved those days with mom. We often took trips to the local library for story time or visited the Bookmobile - a mobile library filled with all the books a kid could dream of.
I look back on my years living in Richmond as though they were a weird dream. Sadly, I haven't seen or felt that sense of community kindness since. Our time there was short-lived as my parents decided to move to a more convenient area. While I was very sad to leave I don't know that I would have the same fondness for those years if we had stayed any longer. I quickly made friends in our new neighborhood, one that remains my very best. And although our new neighbors were perfectly nice - it just wasn't the same living in the city. The things that I thought were so very normal and fun now seemed lame and I learned a new way of living and being... one that was never true to my soul.
I think about Richmond often. I even have a playlist on my iPod with songs from my early childhood years. They bring back vivid memories for me and it is always a place I love to visit in my mind
*** I would love to hear about YOUR favorite childhood memories, the days you wish you could revisit and your most sacred toys and games. Feel free to share it all in a comment ...
Between the ages of two and six I lived in Richmond, RI. On a winding, wooded road called Gardiner. My parents had built a ranch home on a nice sized lot complete with a blueberry patch and plenty of poison ivy. My first crush was on a man named Pete who built the stone retaining wall out back. That very wall would become my kitchen counter where I made mom many a tasty lunch out of plastic raspberries. My father kept the yard nice and even painted the large rock that adorned our front lawn. We made lots of snowmen in that front yard and headed out Trick-or-Treating down the gravel driveway.
Not far up the road was Shady Acres nursing home. I remember at Christmastime we would spend a few hours there cheering up the residents by singing Christmas carols alongside our neighbors. I know, it sounds incredibly corny now but it was so sweet. Something right out of the movie Funny Farm. We had wonderful neighbors. Sure, there were a couple of oddballs who ran a jewelry ring and made moonshine in the basement, and that lady who would spray her diaper-clad toddler with the garden hose - but mostly really kind and generous people that you could depend on. Many families with young children. My brother had lots of friends on our street and, while I was younger than most, I always managed to fit in with the crew.
There was a large campground up the road from our house and in front was a small candy store. My brother and I walked there often - sometimes with mom or with our beloved Paul. No matter the wide variety I always chose my favorite - the five flavor Chuckles. To this very day I can't taste a Chuckle without being transported back to those wonderfully innocent times. Awesome when that happens, huh?
My brother and I were always playing games. I remember Mister Mouth was very popular, I loved that game. We also enjoyed Lite Brite, Simon, Chutes and Ladders, Candy Land and Hungry, Hungry Hippos. I remain a huge fan of the game Memory and even now I can picture the little strawberry card. We rode our Big Wheels alllllllll the time. We called them "Hot Cycles". We would ride them around and around in our musty basement - I can still smell that must. On nice days we stayed outside all day long. There was a construction site close by and we used to play in the huge dirt mounds, climbing and jumping. I could really hang with the roughnecks back then. Nowadays God forbid I get dirt under a fingernail. What happened to that messy little girl???
During the colder months I would help dad bring in wood for the wood stove. Wheelbarrow-ing heaps from the woods behind our house through the bulkhead into the cellar. Dad was clad in flannel and I in my plaid pants and gigantic coat. Mom would have my favorite noodle soup ready on the stove and together we would catch a bit of The Price is Right while lunching. I remember sitting in front of that television with my multicolored wooden blocks and a metal lunchbox. I was only three or four and wanted to pack a lunch like my school-aged brother. The red square was my sandwich, the yellow triangle was cheese and the purple cylinder was my grape soda of course. Mom stayed at home with me while my brother was in school and my dad, a Navy Veteran, split time between his full time job at the V.A. Hospital, Johnson & Wales University and the National Guard. I loved those days with mom. We often took trips to the local library for story time or visited the Bookmobile - a mobile library filled with all the books a kid could dream of.
I look back on my years living in Richmond as though they were a weird dream. Sadly, I haven't seen or felt that sense of community kindness since. Our time there was short-lived as my parents decided to move to a more convenient area. While I was very sad to leave I don't know that I would have the same fondness for those years if we had stayed any longer. I quickly made friends in our new neighborhood, one that remains my very best. And although our new neighbors were perfectly nice - it just wasn't the same living in the city. The things that I thought were so very normal and fun now seemed lame and I learned a new way of living and being... one that was never true to my soul.
I think about Richmond often. I even have a playlist on my iPod with songs from my early childhood years. They bring back vivid memories for me and it is always a place I love to visit in my mind
*** I would love to hear about YOUR favorite childhood memories, the days you wish you could revisit and your most sacred toys and games. Feel free to share it all in a comment ...
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