second baby girl on the way ...

Yes, it's true! It feels so good to finally share the news. Sharing great news always feels good though doesn't it?

It's been a long road. But no longer or more challenging than the road traveled by so many others. And so many others have been robbed of the joy of sharing news like this. So, I first acknowledge them - my dear friends and strangers alike - my heart is with you.

Gregg and I have had our troubles in the past. After a year and a half of trying to conceive, I became pregnant and had a miscarriage. Three months later I started a healthy pregnancy and had my darling Scarlett. When Scarlett turned one we decided to start trying again. A year and a half passed once again and my hopes dwindled as each page of the calendar was turned. And then it happened. And we began another amazing chapter. And here we are - grateful, excited, elated and anxious.

It was May 7th when we learned of the happy news. Gregg had the day off, the weather was beautiful and I had planned for us all to go to the playground. After breakfast I told Scarlett she needed to try to use the potty for five minutes before we headed out. She furiously refused, (she still does). After twenty minutes of crying, whining, tantrums and my growing frustration I headed back downstairs to unpack our bag. I sat in my rocking chair and my eyes filled with tears. After dealing with too many stress factors that week I had finally reached my breaking point. Wait, what? Tears? So not like me. I immediately went to take a pregnancy test and within seconds I saw the plus sign. In disbelief I went upstairs to show Gregg who was still trying to coax Scarlett. We were both in total shock. After eighteen long months we were finally looking at a positive result! It explained so much - like my inability to cope with certain situations over the past week. My emotions had been all over the place and my patience was worn clean through. I took a second test later in the day to be sure and that's when I read the word pregnant - and THAT was a great moment.

For the next three months I battled constant, relentless nausea. No vomiting but the kind of nausea that makes you beg for a quick puke to feel some relief. Every smell made me sick. I couldn't think of a single thing I wanted to eat and had to force myself to eat anything at all. I spent my mornings hovering over a can of ginger ale at the kitchen counter while Scarlett had breakfast. I gagged down oyster crackers and lemon drops to kill the horrid metallic taste in my mouth. I was exhausted. I became the worst playmate ever for Scarlett. Basically, I was in my first trimester. (Nobody likes to hear a pregnant woman complain because we all know what a blessing pregnancy really is ... but man alive, it can get pretty nasty).

Fast forward a bit and you'll find me feeling better. Gregg and I were in a mad dash to get Scarlett's big girl room started and completed within a month. We decided it would be best to move her out of her (smaller) bedroom to the (bigger) playroom. We spun it in a way that made her very excited and proud - I didn't want her to feel booted for a single second.

Yesterday was the most exciting day yet. I had the anatomy ultrasound. I had been praying for another girl for so many reasons and Gregg wanted a boy for obvious reasons. Well, my prayers were answered and we are expecting another little pigtailed spitfire. I'm beyond thrilled. The idea of sisters just makes me smile. I saved everrrrrryyyyyyythinnnnng. We will be upgrading just a few things and buying some new basics but we basically have all that we need. And I'm looking forward to seeing all of those adorable outfits, shoes and sleepers for a second time.

I'm feeling good, feeling blessed and feeling incredibly grateful. And I just cannot wait to see how Scarlett fills her new role as 'big sister' ... it could go either way haha.

Due date: January 15, 2015

yep, I'm pregnant

I did it! I waited 19 whole weeks before spilling the beans! (Hence the lack of blogs.)

Gregg and I are utterly thrilled to announce that we are expecting a baby girl this fall. It's like a dream come true. I think we are both still in shock to be honest. Because of our previous loss (in October 2010) we were very, very nervous throughout the first trimester. Even after my doctor reassured us that the chances of experiencing a loss after hearing the heartbeat at 10 weeks are so, so slim - we still kept our guard up. I only began feeling a little more upbeat after seeing our baby on screen last week and learning that we are having a GIRL. It makes it so real when you are able to use a name -or even a pronoun "she" or "her" - instead of "the baby" or - "IT" (which is just awful). 

So, for all of you who have been taken completely by surprise, here is a recap of the first 19 weeks...

My initial symptoms started early, right around week five. It started with food aversions. I had made a huge batch of broccoli soup- which we LOVED- and a couple of days later I found myself chucking it into the trash can as fast as I could. I just knew if I left it in the fridge a second longer I would die. I couldn't look at it, smell it or even think about it. And to be honest I still can't eat broccoli. Then it was chicken. Brown rice. Coffee. Turkey chili. Spinach. Peppers. My everyday breakfast of egg-whites and English muffins. It seemed as though EVERYTHING that I LOVED to eat on a daily basis was now completely off limits. Awesome. I found myself unable to drink water. Normally I would guzzle down nearly 80 oz per day and now I was struggling to get just 20 oz down. It was so bizarre! 

The nausea followed at week six. I had no appetite whatsoever. You could offer me any food in the world and I couldn't even choose ONE thing that I'd like to eat. I started straying from my typical shopping list and buying things that I hadn't eaten in ten years. Like Chef Boyardee. YUP. I ate canned spaghetti and meatballs. Could you die?? Salt filled canned pasta with skunk meat. I had Ramen noodles - still a favorite but I never buy them due to the sodium. I was drinking gallons of Country Time lemonade. It was all I wanted to drink! I wanted lots of sweets too. My shopping list looked like something a 17 yr old pothead would pen. I begged Gregg to go shopping for me because I was too embarrassed to buy half the stuff on the list. I figured if he got it for me the cashier wouldn't think anything of it because he's tall and lean. If I pull the cart up with that crap in it you know they're judging me. My crazy appetite had quite an effect on our everyday meals. I could never plan to make dinner because by the time I'd make it I couldn't even look at it. Or I would start to eat it and have to throw it away. When I started having to throw food away I decided I wouldn't cook anymore, we would just get take-out or find something easy like PB&J or cereal. I did feel bad for Gregg during this time. It was a bit of a challenge for both of us.

As far as cravings go I didn't have any real crazy episodes. At different times I have wanted: lemonade, Caesar salad, spaghetti, green grapes, pepper-jack cheese, bubble gum, Italian ice, cookies & cream ice cream, an Italian grinder... can't remember any more.  

The fatigue wasn't quite so bad for me as most of my friends had it. I did find it VERY easy to fall asleep at night for once. And I would need a little catnap during the afternoon. A 15 minute snooze was all it took to get me back in action. Being unemployed sucks financially but is fantastic for napping whenever you see fit.

My headaches started around week eight. At first I noticed very sharp headaches that lasted about six hours a couple times per week. Then it progressed to three or four headaches that lasted over 11 hours and were so blinding I had to shut the curtains and at times wear sunglasses in the house. My doctor told me to take Tylenol and have caffeine. I did take Tylenol but I never did try the caffeine. Lucky for me the headaches seemed to stop as of week 18.

The past few weeks have seemed like a dream! The nausea and lack of appetite seemed to come to a halt around 14 weeks. At that time I also found that I didn't need that little nap anymore. (Well, sometimes I still do). I think the only thing going on at this point is that my feet hurt! I guess they widened and I may have fallen arches or something but anyway it is hardly anything to complain about! I am feeling good everyday, my appetite is back - I am even eating STEAK now!! (I have not eaten steak since I was a wee tot, I LOATHED it). We are able to prepare healthy meals once again and I am enjoying the fresh fruits and veggies already!

I'll just leave you with the story of the most exciting day of our life (to date) ... 
Last Thursday, Cinco de Mayo actually, we had my anatomy ultrasound. The purpose is really to measure all of the organs and make sure that everything is developing properly... but everyone knows it's when you find out the sex of the baby. We couldn't WAIT for this day. As soon as we saw the little peanut on screen it was just miraculous. She was moving all over the place (and I still haven't felt any of that!) it was amazing. When we first saw her she had one hand up by her forehead and one knee bent - she looked like me when I'm basking in the sun hahaha. The ultrasound tech said, "Look how dramatic she is already!" It was so friggin cute! So after all of the measurements were taken it was time for the big reveal!! But her legs were too close together! So the US tech was moving my stomach all over the place and we'd watch the baby move too. So cute. Finally I heard, "Well it looks like you have a little girl here" and I could NOT believe it. I had wanted a girl so badly I was just waiting for the word "boy" to come out of her mouth. I said, "GET OUT! I'll DIE!" And she again said that it was a girl. I asked how sure she was and she gave us 85%. (My doctor said she never goes over 90% so it's a pretty good number haha). Gregg and I left that appointment just grinning from ear to ear. We immediately went to buy sundresses.

 That's our baby girl :o)

(we are keeping her name a secret)

We spent the next day registering for our shower. SO OVERWHELMING. We spent four hours in there and I had to do the rest online because I thought my legs were going to give out. We bought a few more outfits too. Hee hee. And today I went on a little spree at Carter's with my mom. My sister-in-law gave us a big bag of adorable clothes that she bought on Friday. My mom gave us another big bag of clothes that she bought also on Friday. These gals were waiting SO long to go shopping! Everyone is just thrilled for us and thrilled that we're having a girl because there are so many boys in the family already. This is my mom's first grandchild so she is just over the moon with excitement. It's been really fun and I just have to let you all know how grateful and thankful I truly am for this experience. I will keep you updated on everything from here on out I promise! Sorry for keeping you in the dark for so long but wasn't it a FANTASTIC secret???