Too rigid? Perhaps, but exactly how carefree can I be without unraveling like a cheap-ass sweater you'd find at the local drug store? I'm the type of person that thrives on organized regimens and control. I demand that my baby girl's ass explodes before I put her in the Christening dress, I admit it. If the clipboard says 'it's time for peas and a bottle' you'd better believe that my girl will be green-snouted and pot-bellied within the half hour.
So, is that such a BAD thing? Having a finely tuned schedule that works for everyone? I don't think it is. It did take about five months to really get it all down. Until that point it was a grab bag of semi-controlled chaos at best. I realize that babies do their own thing. I know they follow their own natural paths. I get it. But is it so wrong to want to help them along and maybe benefit from it in my own sneaky way? Nah. It's not like I can't go with the flow to a certain extent. I mean, I don't believe that Scarlett is going to eat, crap and nap at the same exact times every day. I don't naively think that her routines won't change a thousand and forty eight more times before she is two. I've heard that as moms we are supposed to surrender all control and just let things go as they will. That's just not gonna fly with me.
Everything works well for us on a daily basis but occasionally we run into a few snags. Like, for instance, if we are invited out at night. BEFORE, when Scarlett wasn't going to bed until 11pm it wasn't an issue. But NOW that she has her last bottle at 7:30pm and is in bed by 8 o'clock - I don't want to mess with that. I like to be home by 7 o'clock with the baby in her cozy sleeper, wound down, soothed and ready for slumber. If we stay out later than that she's all out of sorts. Overtired and over-stimulated. It has taken up to two weeks to get her back on track in the past. It's simply not worth it.So for now, I continue to carry my clipboard and click my stopwatch. I am running the show - with Scarlett as my co-host. A bit of role-reversal? Yeah, maybe... but I like it this way. And she does too. Her beautiful, consistent smile is all the proof I need.
I wrote this post based on The Lightning and the Lightning Bug's
Flicker of Inspiration Prompt #42: Killer First Line.
I am the same way! My first was on such a great scheduled and I did everything I could not to mess with it. It's evolved over time but she is still the only kid I know who will ask to go to bed! My second is only 4 months and a schedule has been hard to figure out but I still try... I NEED some sort of order!
ReplyDeleteRight??? I just can't be one of those moms who is always running around all hours of the day and night with the baby in tow - napping mainly on car rides and eating bananas on the bench in front of Yankee Candle. I maintain peace in my head by keeping a schedule. It did take a while but I think that's based on the baby's age - at 5 mo I was able to streamline.
DeleteThanks so much for reading and I'm so glad you share the same views - sometimes people make me think that I'm crazy. :) Good luck with your 4 mo old!
I've never heard of mothers surrendering all control. Never! If I would've, I would've told that person to stuff it. Hell no. No, no, no! I had one kid and she was always on a schedule. We both needed it. I can't fly by the seat of my pants and just go with the flow. It's not in my personality. I need structure, like you. And, guess what? The kid liked structure. So go with your feelings and do what you think is going to work for you. Don't listen to anybody else, including me. Each parent/child relationship is different and you have to find what works with the two of you.....
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHA THANK YOU. Thank you thank you thank you. Some people look at me like I'm crazy for wanting to maintain order and have a daily regimen. At first I would second guess myself, being a new mom and all, but now I'm like, Beat it, know-it-alls ... I'm doing things my way. I think you are absolutely right, every parent/child relationship IS different - I've never heard of two the same. Similarities yes, same exact? Never.
DeleteThank you so much for stopping by and sharing your views :)
I too am ruled by a schedule and I have my sanity as a reward ;) It took me a while as well but we've been on basically the same routine since she was 5 mos (she's now 20) yes im flexible and some days we do things different and naps may happen in the car not her crib, but it makes life SO much easier to plan when u and the kid are on a schedule. I refuse to be the mom with the kid having a complete meltdown in the store cause nap time was ignored.
ReplyDeleteExactly. We've had some days where Scarlett only gets her morning nap in the car while out doing errands or days where her afternoon nap consists of a 30 minute snooze on her Auntie's or Grandma's shoulder. But overall, I have it down and I minimize the drama. I avoid what can be avoided and deal with the hiccups accordingly :)
Deletehahahahaha....That is a killer opener for sure!
ReplyDeleteYou are so right about the number of times the schedule will change. They are constantly growing and expanding their horizons. A semi-control freak myself, one of the best things motherhood has taught me is to breathe easier and let go of my grip (to a reasonable degree, mind you!). There is a peace that comes in letting go and trusting all will be well. Of course, it is a peace that is gained only over bloodied palms and a sweat drenched forehead from the battle of trying to hold on too tightly. It comes upon a couple of noteworthy battlefields, Toddlerhood and Teens. But still..peace in the end !
Please don't mention Toddlerhood OR Teens as those subjects give me instant anxiety. HAHA (I'm only half kidding).
DeleteI am happy to say that I am relatively laid back when it comes to a lot of everyday issues (baby related). Such as when she rolls over onto her back and thumps her head on the floor time and time again, or when she had a stomach bug and her first cold. Most recently I'm trying to be less anxious about germs and especially the dog licking her. I think in time I'll let go a little more - but I love having a routine with her. It's just making the daily grind a little easier.
Thanks for reading, May! Love the feedback :)
That first line literally made me laugh out loud! I don't have kids yet, but I have a feeling I'll be remembering this when the time comes haha
ReplyDeleteNice job :-)
hahaha well thank you! I appreciate your reading it and when the time comes for you, let me know how it goes ;)
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